Ken Cuccinelli, shithead extreme, thinks homosexuality is "against the natural order". He is a Republipuke running for Attorney General in Vagina, I mean Virginia, but thinks he is a biologist who knows something about what is natural. Twisted fuck, I hope he gets sick and dies because he prevented a gay man from practicing medicine. Win or lose, he will get a lot of votes from people who will listen to Elton John, wear Versace clothes, watch movies starring Anne Heche, and live in a coutntry that thousands of gay people have given their lives to protect. Allow me to say Fuck You One And All to anyone who votes for Cuntcinelli on behalf of the above maligned (and fabulous!) homosexuals.

People are dying because this kind of shit is tolerated in our country. Cuntcinelli gets up on TV and says "Unnatural! Unclean!" and some stupid inbred farmboy from the midwest goes and kills someone coming out of a gay bar. It's happened a thousand times. And remember Cuntcinelli is a Conservative Republican, which means he spends a lot of time in public toilets soliciting sex from undercover police officers. Or so I've heard.

REMEMBER: EVERYTHING THE CONSERVATIVE REPUBLICANS COMPLAIN ABOUT THEY ARE DOING THEMSELVES BEHIND THE SCENES.

P.S.: It's unnatural to have a nose that looks like a dolphin leaping out of a cesspool. I mean it. His face looks like it's been smooshed in photoshop.

What is with these crazy-ass Muslim immigrants? This turd woman tried to cut her husband's throat as he slept. She complains that he "forced" her to drink alcohol, eat pork, have an orgasm, etc. And by the way, we don't know if ANY of those things really happened. She says she went along with it "to please him, but there was war inside her" (she must be talking about the orgasm). Shut. The. Fuck. Up. You murderous bitch. I am glad to know that now you have been so defiled, no other man will have you. That is, if we don't execute you. Bitch needs to be fried, in bacon grease.

Open letter to immigrants: don't bring your brainless bullshit murderous prejudices here. If you want to join our party, you are welcome in my book. But if you pee in the pool, I will shove a hambone up your ass, so help me Allah!

It is not enough to call Faleh Hassan Almaleki a pig man, he is PIG SHIT INCARNATE! He tried to kill his own daughter and a friend of hers by running them over with his car. Poster child for the death penalty, plain and simple. And yet, horrible as his crime is, it is emblematic of something much stranger and worse.

This guy is an Iraqi immigrant who felt that his daughter had become too westernized, so he tried to murder her. WHY THE HELL DID YOU COME HERE, YOU BLOATED FUCKING TURD? If you were afraid of her becoming westernized, why didn't you stay home in your pestilential rat-hole of a country whose culture peaked several thousand years ago? I'm sure you wanted access to our vigorous economy, or maybe you were fleeing the repressive political regime. SO YOU DECIDED TO SET UP YOUR OWN REPRESSIVE REGIME RIGHT HERE! Shithead.

Open letter to anyone wanting to immigrate to the U.S: if you don't want to abide by our laws and tolerate our culture, keep your stinking shit-smeared self where you belong, in the hellish prison-country where you were born. There you can go on beating your wife and fucking your children, rather than the opposite as we do here.

When was the last time you heard of an American moving to another country and then killing their child because they had soaked up too much local culture?

Out of respect for her privacy, I will not even mention the name of Roman Polanski's child-rape victim because it would create yet another raft of Google links to her. But the respect ends there. And before I get started on my real point, I have to remind her that every time she opens her mouth about the case she defeats her own cause of privacy. In fact, she kind of reminds me of the parents of the Balloon Boy, desperate for attention.

Now to the real point (switching to first person for effect): honey, as sorry as I am about what happened to you, the very idea that justice should be aborted for your personal comfort is disgusting. Oh I admit that I would probably feel exactly as you do were I in your position, but I would hope someone would point this out to me: the court case is not about avenging your tragedy. It's about the US having a justice system that applies to everybody, and does not exempt the rich and famous and people who are idolized by Woody Allen. Notice how I do not extend the same grace to Woody as I do to you as he is not a victim at all, and deserves to have his name irrevocably connected to the words child-rape, even though he did not commit that crime.

Pervlanski needs to come back and take his lumps. He is the poster child for Do-As-I-Say-Not-As-I-Do. How can that sick fuck (and remarkably talented artist) complain that Swiss law (is that a self-contradicting term?) is treating him unfairly when he is a fugitive from justice, cowardly hiding in a country without extradition laws? Can you say HYPOCRITE? The man needs to serve time, and through his own actions may now die in jail because he put off the day of reckoning for so long. Way to go, Romeo.

I would like to point out the case of one Cassius Clay. Before he became Mohamed Ali, Clay went to jail for his refusal to go to Viet Nam. Likely he saved his own life by doing so. And he did this when he was a young athlete, with no guarantee that he would have any sort of career when he got out. Most athletes in contact sports have very short careers, and a few years can make all the difference in the world. Yet he stood up for his beliefs,  and came back to become Heavyweight Champion etc.

Now let us compare this to Roamin' Pukelanksi. He could have plea bargained, appealed, taken his lumps and been released from jail to go on making films. He himself  has proven that one can still direct at 80 years old, and he's not the first to do so. That pretty much proves that neither his life nor his career would have been over when he was released. And don't whine to me about how the stigma of being an ex-con would have hurt him; could it be worse that being convicted in absentia and adding bail jumping to his crimes? I think not. The French, at least, will suck up anything that comes out of any orifice of this "man's" (I use the word man loosely here) body.

Oh those inbred German fucks, the Hanovers, oops I mean the Windsors, are at it again. Princess Andrew (picured above sniffing his fingers after scratching his crotch) has given us all a good tongue-lashing for attacking the monstrous and inhuman bonuses of the financial executives:

"I don't want to demonise the banking and financial sector," said the Duke of Dork, I mean York, "...bonuses, in the scheme of things, are minute. They are easy to target. A number (of people) will have abused their privilege of a bonus, so get rid of the excesses, but don't throw the baby out with the bathwater."

What "baby" is this feeble-minded potential monarch referring to? The bonuses? Well I'm sure they are precious to the yacht-sailing, Roll Royce-driving, cousin-fucking hemophiliac crowd he dances with, but I see them as unearned gifts to the idle rich. And I certainly know who the bathwater is: you and I.

Listen here Annette, you asswipe. If a burglar breaks into my house and only steals a few hundred bucks, a minute amount in the scheme of things (maybe your scheme of things, you stinking silver-spoon sucking pig), shouldn't I want to prosecute? And the banking fucks have stolen 80 percent of the retirement money I saved over decades of making fortunes for stuck-up shits like you. It is an endless astonishment to Americans that you and your family ever got a penny from the hard working people of the world that you have larded, excuse me, lorded over for centuries. Mommy Dearest, the Queen, is the wealthiest woman in the world, and you stick up for your rich-bitch buddies? Some of whom actually have a job, unlike your gross porking self?

If you need any proof that Asswipe, I mean Andrea, doesn't think laws apply to him, I direct you to this article:

http://arbroath.blogspot.com/2008/09/prince-andrew-takes-ironing-board-on.html

Seems like the little git from London threw a hissy fit when nobody met him with an umbrella at the airport, and proceed to drive his hundred thousand dollar car up onto the sidewalk in a blind rage so he wouldn't get his hair wet. If indeed that shite on his head is hair, looks more like poop. Did you know that this upper-class twat was going to honor the murdering terrorist Libyans with a visit? Was he going to thank them for blowing up hundreds of Brits and Americans and others over Lockerbie? The trip was only canceled in the furor over releasing the man who executed the bombing, and who was greeted with a hero's welcome in Libya by the motherfucking cannibal Kaddafi in person: terror-master Kaddafi was laughing himself sick at the utter humiliation of the rotting remains of the British Empire who are now trading their own blood for oil, drop for drop. I'll bet the Princess was on his way to deliver a congratulatory tongue-lashing (British for oral sex). One can only hope he swallows, maybe he'll get AIDS.

I just don't know what to say about this walking-turd woman, other than this: if I saw her burning by the side of the road, I wouldn't spare the urine to piss her out. Harsh, you think? Read on.

The murderous pigwoman's name is Carmen Huertas. After guzzling a vat of cognac at a birthday party, and being told that she was too drunk to drive but angrily ignoring the advice, she stuffs eight kids, including her own two children (one only 14 months old) into her Sable and roars off down the street. One father retrieved his child from the car before the death train left the station. Then, insanely speeding and swerving down the road, this piece of shit TAUNTS the kids in the car: "She demanded they raise their hands if they thought they would make it home without crashing." Her 11-year-old daughter, Brittany Gonzalez, begged her to slow down. Pigshit Woman's response?

"If you think this is bad, wait until we get on the highway."

Needless to say, the car went airborne, flipped over and landed upside down, killing someone else's little girl. Astonishingly, and thankfully, only one child died.

Never, ever, EVER should this woman be allowed out of jail. They should electrocute her and leave the juice running for a week, just to make sure. But not before she is cluster-fucked with a cactus in every orifice. Unfortunately, the authorities are so far planning to charge her with something that could have her back on the road in time to vote for Sarah Palin.

Today, Rush Limbaugh (among others) got punked by a satirical blog post that said the President's college thesis trashed the constitution, fart fart fart, blah blah blah. Of course it turned out to be fake. And that bloated asshole Limbarf had to retract it even before the end of the show where he had announced it with great glee. Having found that he had spread damaging lies that can never be erased (someone will be repeating these lies years from now, like the Birther bullshit, see UPDATE below), did he apologize? Absolutely not. He said that he doesn't have to apologize because he knows that the President is actually thinking those thoughts. And why not? Why should Rush check out a story before repeating it, as long as it puts money in his pocket?

Fuck you to hell and back, Limpdick, you sick profiteering piece of shit. Anybody who has been paying attention would have remembered that there has already been a brouhaha about Obama's thesis: it was about nuclear proliferation and the Conservatwats didn't like his stance on it. All of a sudden somebody comes up with a lie about the thesis being on some other topic completely, and Rush conveniently forgets. Probably due to all that Vicodin he binged on that destroyed his hearing (I'd like to prosecute the doctor who restored it!) and scrambled his brains.

By the way, remember when Rush got caught with someone else's Viagra prescription trying to smuggle it back in through customs when he returned from a sex vacation in Costa Rica? That country is a well known sex destination with a huge sex industry, and nobody goes there with a bottle of Viagra if they are visiting the rain forests. Clearly Rush went there to drain his diseased balls (may they fall off one at a time). I heard that the unfortunate underaged boy who was paid to screw Rush's fat ass vomited continuously for months afterwords. Or at least I read that on a blog somewhere... I think, maybe.

I apologize for filing this under "Pig People", it is really demeaning to pigs to be grouped with the fecal missile that is Tush, I mean Rush. And all of you who support him and his ilk with your patronage and donations, I can only hope you give till it hurts. Badly. Keep on giving. Until you lose your homes. And I will laugh as I pass you when you are sleeping on the street, may you roast in hell forever with your fat fuck buddy.

By the way, do you like the picture? That's the Great Oink himself, about to lick his fingers after removing them from his asshole.

UPDATE: here is a quote from a Birther moron who not only thinks this story is real, after everybody involved has apologized for being taken in, but then goes on to repeat the craziest Birther shit yet. This is a comment from the blog of the seminal idiot Michael Ledeen who read the month's old satire piece on Twitter and blogged about it as truth, causing this whole wonderful event. Thanks Michael, nobody has ever made a bigger fool out of the shit-eating Right as you have! Here's the comment:

"The big question is: What does Obama have on Michael Ledeen to force his silence? Is it a coincidence that Michael Ledeen had this information about a man who has spent $921 million in legal fees to hide his secret past and birth records, but then suddenly it’s all a hoax? Don’t worry, Mr. Ledeen, we’re on the case, and the truth will come out!"

This idiot thinks Obama spent nine hundred million dollars hiding his birth certificate. That's more money than was spent on all the lawyers in America (may they die a horrible death!) combined in who knows how long. What a fool. And he's not just saying that for ratings, as I suspect Limpdick is. This guy really believes it and will never let any amount of facts change his mind, I can tell.

I think the picture speaks for itself, oink oink. At 22, she might be fresh but she sure ain't pretty. But that's not what makes her a pig.

To quote CNN: "Brooke Hundley, the ESPN production assistant who had an affair with Steve Phillips and then sent a letter to his wife detailing their exploits (and his crotch birthmark)..." What an utterly disgusting pig woman. In her letter to Steve's wife, oinker Hundley claims that she is very concerned with his well being. And then goes on to describe his penis. Then she takes the letter, sticks it on the door of his home and rams the fence with her car as she tears across his lawn driving away like the madwoman she is. Oh yeah, her big concern is for him, right. Sure, just like OJ Simpson is concerned for his wife.

I'm sick of it. She's an adult (and she's not an intern), she had an affair with a man high up in her workplace. No part of what happens to her after that is anything but her own fault unless someone breaks the law, and they haven't. She then seeks revenge when he dumps her, all the while claiming concern for him. Hundley is a sick sociopath that will go on to bigger and worse offenses, mark my words. I just can't stand watching scum like her play the victim. And, by the way, this posturing only works for women. A man sleeping with a female executive then complaining about it would be laughed off the bus.

P.S.: I didn't mean to suggest that Phillips is blameless, or not a pig for cheating on his wife; Philips is a boar and Hundley is a sow. God I love that word, sow.

If you watch one piece of video today, it ought to be this one:

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2009/10/22/tuchman.sweat.lodge.survivor.cnn

Don't worry, it's not graphic. It's a woman describing the scene in James Ray's sweat lodge of death. After the first few people passed out, these insane shitheads urged everybody else to remain in the lodge. Afterwords, when people were dead and dying around her, this poor lady dentist who was trained in CPR was prevented from helping anybody and had to watch the staff doing CPR incorrectly. Her voice and her story are heartbreaking to hear.

And of course James Ray, the evil little shit, has fled the state (Arizona) and is refusing to cooperate with the authorities. And the lodge has already been torn down, don't want any pesky evidence hanging around, now do we.

This is right up there with the newage (rhymes with sewage) folks who try to pray their children out of cancer. But even those sick, child-killing parents (is there a greater crime?) don't generally profit from it. These poor fools spent $9000 apiece to die in James Ray's oven. Idiots. How many times do you need to be told: you've got to start basting before the meat burns!

UPDATE: Another astonishing description of Murder Ray's idea of empowering:

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/crime/2009/10/24/pkg.tuchman.ray.sweat.cnn

This couple talks about an earlier seminar where Ray encouraged his students to summon their inner energy and break concrete blocks with their fists. The results, a dozen people with broken hands, nearly all of whom went back and paid this sick fuckin' murderer for more abuse. Including this couple, as well: they went and attended one of his sweat lodges after witnessing the hand breaking. The result? Husband had to bail out sick halfway through the sweat, one woman passed out, and Murder Ray "hopped in his golf cart" and drove off without helping. Scum. Fucking. Bag. Needs to be marinated and braised.

Whatever one might think of the President, there seems little doubt that Michelle Obama is the best First Lady of the United States in my lifetime. I mean, does she even have any competition? From whom?

Reptilian Nancy Reagen and her idiotic Just Say No campaign and her astrologers? Drunken Betty Ford? The non-entity wives of Bush senior and junior? Michelle is out there taking names and kicking ass. On top of having the right opinions on all the right subjects, I think she was more important to getting her husband elected president than any woman since Martha Washington blew Aaron Burr (I made that up). I can even imagine Michelle being a better president than her spouse, she's less of a people pleaser than he is.

Man, look at her skipping Double-Dutch! I couldn't even do that when I was a kid. If I tried it now I would end up strangling myself.